Welcome to the HoH Blog Cast. Today I’m doing something new. I am adding an audio blog post in addition to the written blog.
At www.hallsofhealing.com, I write and post a written blog article for you each week. But I know from my own experience, that life gets busy and reading articles and/or watching videos are always convenient. So with that in mind, I will be making available an audio blog as well as the written blog for you here at www.hallsofhealing. I hope you enjoy.
What is the number one sin that you could commit that will torpedo your relationships? What kind of action is guaranteed to throw your relationship with other people for a loop? This applies to all types of relationships. It may be a business relationship, an intimate relationship, or your relationship with your family members and close friends. It is guaranteed to cripple your relationship if you do this one thing.
What is this practice that corrodes your ability to connect with people in a deep and meaningful way? You might not think much of it because it seems basic and simple and a lot of people are too quick to dismiss it. A lot of people aren’t even aware that they are doing this.
Just like with anything else in life, big disasters usually do not happen overnight. Have you ever read about buildings collapsing or bridges giving way? If you read the literature or police reports or news reports on those disasters, there is a common thread. Usually, the signs are already there but people are just too busy to care. They knew that something was off because there were small cracks noticeable or there was some indication that the angle of the bridge is not right. Unfortunately, people sit up and pay attention when it's already too late.
With that as a background, the number one practice that is guaranteed to cripple your relationship is the unwillingness to listen. I know, it may seem like a small thing. It might even seem like it is obvious but so many people drop the ball when it comes to this key relationship ability.
Are you really listening?
Do you really listen to people? Be honest. When you talk to somebody, they usually interrupt. Or vice versa. They butt in to make a point, make a correction or just to add their point of view. They never really absorb what is being said. They never take the opportunity to learn. Instead of talking and listening, we engage in some sort of verbal ping pong.
Learning to listen can be like metal sharpening metal. It may be uncomfortable at first but that's how we grow as people, it helps us grow mentally and it strengthens our cognitive abilities. The problem is we often go through the motions, and we don't really value the conversation for what it is.
When you really listen to somebody, you must assume that they can teach you something. That's the core assumption that you have to go back to and make the centerpiece of your conversation. Otherwise, it's going to be difficult for you to give the kind of respect and importance it needs. You need to remember that, because if you don't assume that you will learn anything from people, it would be very hard for you to listen.
Be honest with yourself. Ask and go back to my central question. Do you really listen? The moment you start rediscovering the art of listening, is the moment you truly reconnect with people.
I challenge you to challenge your listening abilities. Practice listening without interruption. Without thinking about how you will respond or how you may agree or disagree with what is being said. Just listen.
Thank you for listening and/or reading my blog. Please feel free to write in the comments any thoughts you may have about this week’s blog. I would love to hear what you liked or disliked as well as requests or suggestions for future blog posts.
Until next week, be healthy and happy. Take care.