You may still feel unsure about the idea of self-love, especially if all of your whole life you've been taught to put others ahead of yourself and that it’s selfish to take care of yourself. Hopefully, you’re starting to see that self-care is an important part of developing as a healthy person. Valuing yourself is not the same as narcissism. In this post, you’ll discover what it means to be a narcissist and the ways in which self-love is different.
What is a Narcissist?
A narcissist takes loving themselves to the extreme. They take this exclusion of others to the extent that they actually tend to lack empathy. Narcissists tend to compare themselves to other people, always needing to be considered better. If they don’t feel they excel in comparison, they often become angry. Not only are they concerned with being better than others, they also must keep up appearances. They are worried that those around them won’t see them as a stellar employee, caring spouse, or a good friend. They’re more worried about how they look in playing the role rather than how they actually perform it and how they treat others. They also want the people around them to validate how wonderful they are. They enjoy heaps of praise for their performance. They also look to status symbols for their worth - such as fancy cars, impressive titles, and expensive jewelry. In addition, the narcissist usually sees things as black or white. They love you or they hate you. The underlying reasons for all these traits is that they don’t hold themselves in high regard.
Why Self-Love is Different
Self-love differs from narcissism because the individual who loves themselves actually has positive feelings about their worth as a person. Their actions are driven by the fact that they have compassion for themselves and care about others. Self-love without narcissism involves thinking highly of yourself without needing to feel better than others. It is concerned with doing well for the sake of the end result, not simply to look good. When you genuinely love yourself, you also want to do right by others, and you aren’t interested merely in how you come across. Your actions aren’t driven by deep-seated insecurity and self-loathing.
Why It Matters
It’s important to understand the difference between self-love and narcissism if you want to fully embrace self-love without second guessing yourself. The fact that you’re concerned with being self-centered matters. This shows that you are concerned with being a good person and with your effect on the people around you. This fact usually indicates that you don’t have to worry about becoming a narcissist.
If you’re worried as you continue your self-love journey, take time to read this blog article again. Look at yourself and your actions to determine your motivations for viewing yourself highly. This type of assessment can help you to stay on track toward practicing healthy self-love.